BLOEMHARD, Roy
RAPER, Dick
Please god no.
Preserving Absurdity
Strange things from the Archives...
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Names from the lovely K!
"Awesome Muster Roll Names from USS Piedmont (AD-17)"
ROSCOES, Roosevelt T
LOVIN Jr, John B
John b lovin u 4eva.
ROYALTY, Charles A
FAGGART, William
LILLY, Kermit
So what if he was born before Kermit the Frog, see how both Kermits are associated with lily pads?
LITTLEWALKER, Van
BONECUTTER, Harold
Heyzeus! Ouch on a stick!
KING, German
Who are you? German King. Which German King? THE German King.
DUVALL, Calmer
I suspect it's more like Kal-mer.
FELIX, Firmitive
Firmitive?
GODBEHERE, Freeman
He be here, there, and everywhere.
DE HATE, Paul
TITTERNESS, Peter B
hehe
CHEATWEED, Kenneth
ROSCOES, Roosevelt T
LOVIN Jr, John B
John b lovin u 4eva.
ROYALTY, Charles A
FAGGART, William
LILLY, Kermit
So what if he was born before Kermit the Frog, see how both Kermits are associated with lily pads?
LITTLEWALKER, Van
BONECUTTER, Harold
Heyzeus! Ouch on a stick!
KING, German
Who are you? German King. Which German King? THE German King.
DUVALL, Calmer
I suspect it's more like Kal-mer.
FELIX, Firmitive
Firmitive?
GODBEHERE, Freeman
He be here, there, and everywhere.
DE HATE, Paul
TITTERNESS, Peter B
hehe
CHEATWEED, Kenneth
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Then I thought, Fickett, I'll do it
BEDGOOD, William
Sure hope so.
BROGG, La France
What is going on here?
DE WEE, John
SMELLEY, Ludie
PURVES, Lawrence
SCANDALITO, Giacomo
FUNK, Frank
GOODLATTE Jr, Aruther
OUTLAW, Cleatus B
This definitely sounds like a bad fictional character's name.
FRICK Jr, Courtland
PEAVY, Bonny
HOLM, Varnold
ARCHANGEL, Michael Di
Could have been Gabriel just as easily, right?
MUSKRAT, Billy
OW, Joseph
COMES AT NIGHT Jr, George
lol
FICKEN, Roger
SHRUM, Moore
More 'shrooms please?
PROPHET, Columbus
An unfortunate combination.
GIRLEY, David
In the Navy.
BIGGER Jr, James
FOX Jr, Comly
NERBY, Duane
TOTO, Vito
TITTLE, John
BOGGS, Chalmus
I never understand the odd first name coupled with the stupid last name. The first name is easier to remedy.
PIGGEE Sr, Howard
BUMGARDNER, Raymond
Never liked Raymond. Or his garden of butts. Or his butt gardener.
CLUTTER, Forrest
This forest is full of clutter! Clean it up NOW!
WALKUP, Olice
Olice?
FAILS, Norville
And he always will. No matter what.
LENNON, John W
Seriously - I wonder what the middle name was.
FICKETT, Merle
Eh, fickett.
JAHN, John
I've never seen such cleverity! (Pronounced cle-VER-ity)
FROM, James
To Mrs From - From Mr From
HOOKER, Necolious
Glorious.
RICE, Royce
HOLOCHWOST, Vincent
He depresses everyone.
DIES, Robert
No fear of mortality here.
CLICK, Richard
Dick Click?
ELEFANTE, Restituto
NUTTER, Larry
All Larrys are nutters. Are all nutters Larrys?
More to come...
Sure hope so.
BROGG, La France
What is going on here?
DE WEE, John
SMELLEY, Ludie
PURVES, Lawrence
SCANDALITO, Giacomo
FUNK, Frank
GOODLATTE Jr, Aruther
OUTLAW, Cleatus B
This definitely sounds like a bad fictional character's name.
FRICK Jr, Courtland
PEAVY, Bonny
HOLM, Varnold
ARCHANGEL, Michael Di
Could have been Gabriel just as easily, right?
MUSKRAT, Billy
OW, Joseph
COMES AT NIGHT Jr, George
lol
FICKEN, Roger
SHRUM, Moore
More 'shrooms please?
PROPHET, Columbus
An unfortunate combination.
GIRLEY, David
In the Navy.
BIGGER Jr, James
FOX Jr, Comly
NERBY, Duane
TOTO, Vito
TITTLE, John
BOGGS, Chalmus
I never understand the odd first name coupled with the stupid last name. The first name is easier to remedy.
PIGGEE Sr, Howard
BUMGARDNER, Raymond
Never liked Raymond. Or his garden of butts. Or his butt gardener.
CLUTTER, Forrest
This forest is full of clutter! Clean it up NOW!
WALKUP, Olice
Olice?
FAILS, Norville
And he always will. No matter what.
LENNON, John W
Seriously - I wonder what the middle name was.
FICKETT, Merle
Eh, fickett.
JAHN, John
I've never seen such cleverity! (Pronounced cle-VER-ity)
FROM, James
To Mrs From - From Mr From
HOOKER, Necolious
Glorious.
RICE, Royce
HOLOCHWOST, Vincent
He depresses everyone.
DIES, Robert
No fear of mortality here.
CLICK, Richard
Dick Click?
ELEFANTE, Restituto
NUTTER, Larry
All Larrys are nutters. Are all nutters Larrys?
More to come...
Monday, June 27, 2011
Before I lose another list of glorious names..
Allow me to preserve it. Apologies if there are repeats from my previous posts...
FINGER, James The. [sic]
Poor choice of period position.
GUMMERSCHEIMER, Virgil
COOL, Normand P
I don't think so.
PETROPPOULOUS, Photoius P
Dying to know what his middle name was.
SUKOW, Wayne
DISNEY, Walter E
ROBERG, Robert R
Slight variation on Robert Roberts / Robertson.
DeMOUTH, Norman
McJUNKIN Jr, Hugh K
LOVIN, Benjamin
Ben Lovin
PICKELSIMER, Merlin
COCKMAN, James
He's not an ass man, he's a Cockman.
GOO, James
Ho, Arthur
Thunder. Thunder. Thundercats, Arthur Ho!
RED, Dunklin
CASTRO, Fidel
I like finding famous names.
CORPORAL, Herculano
WANK, Peter
Hilarious last name. Hilarious-er when coupled with first name.
BELCH, Joseph
STONEMAN, Royal
PITTMAN, Gaylin
ELG, Ted
Short. Weird.
ADMIRE, Evell
PRESLEY, Quitman
BIGHEAD, Konzie
TART, Major
RICH, Guy
FOX Jr, Jewell
DICKMAN, Richard
KUNTZ Jr, Harry
Say it ain't so!
STUMP, Alpha
ROYAL, Roy B
BELCHER, Frank
BENN, Darlington
PLUMLEY, Earl Fay
COWHERD Jr, Velveteen
CAREY, Larry
FLUCK, Stephen
BUTTS, Haze C
INCH, Larry
YOHO, Harry
DROWN, Floyd
What's he doing on a ship?
TURNIPSEED, John
Johnny Appleseed sounded tastier.
PUDDER, William
WHYNOT, Howard
ARD, "R" "B"
Do the quotes imply a lack of first name?
PECK, Lafry
MONK, Zaron
PERFECT Jr, Curt O
TRUELOVE, Dewey
DICKEY, Gail
MULLETT, Fred "B"
FARDO, Carol
FLOWERS, Gayland
MANTOOTH, Ronald Ray
GLEEN, Thelma
BOGUTSKIE Jr, Florian
KRAPPS, Thomas B
WARRIOR Jr, Herbert
KNOCK, Dick
FURRY, Arthur
HAGG, Jack
KENNARD, Kenneth
Il est domage que tu es kennard :P
VODICKA, James
BEGAY, Flebix
More to follow. Hopefully soon.
FINGER, James The. [sic]
Poor choice of period position.
GUMMERSCHEIMER, Virgil
COOL, Normand P
I don't think so.
PETROPPOULOUS, Photoius P
Dying to know what his middle name was.
SUKOW, Wayne
DISNEY, Walter E
ROBERG, Robert R
Slight variation on Robert Roberts / Robertson.
DeMOUTH, Norman
McJUNKIN Jr, Hugh K
LOVIN, Benjamin
Ben Lovin
PICKELSIMER, Merlin
COCKMAN, James
He's not an ass man, he's a Cockman.
GOO, James
Ho, Arthur
Thunder. Thunder. Thundercats, Arthur Ho!
RED, Dunklin
CASTRO, Fidel
I like finding famous names.
CORPORAL, Herculano
WANK, Peter
Hilarious last name. Hilarious-er when coupled with first name.
BELCH, Joseph
STONEMAN, Royal
PITTMAN, Gaylin
ELG, Ted
Short. Weird.
ADMIRE, Evell
PRESLEY, Quitman
BIGHEAD, Konzie
TART, Major
RICH, Guy
FOX Jr, Jewell
DICKMAN, Richard
KUNTZ Jr, Harry
Say it ain't so!
STUMP, Alpha
ROYAL, Roy B
BELCHER, Frank
BENN, Darlington
PLUMLEY, Earl Fay
COWHERD Jr, Velveteen
CAREY, Larry
FLUCK, Stephen
BUTTS, Haze C
INCH, Larry
YOHO, Harry
DROWN, Floyd
What's he doing on a ship?
TURNIPSEED, John
Johnny Appleseed sounded tastier.
PUDDER, William
WHYNOT, Howard
ARD, "R" "B"
Do the quotes imply a lack of first name?
PECK, Lafry
MONK, Zaron
PERFECT Jr, Curt O
TRUELOVE, Dewey
DICKEY, Gail
MULLETT, Fred "B"
FARDO, Carol
FLOWERS, Gayland
MANTOOTH, Ronald Ray
GLEEN, Thelma
BOGUTSKIE Jr, Florian
KRAPPS, Thomas B
WARRIOR Jr, Herbert
KNOCK, Dick
FURRY, Arthur
HAGG, Jack
KENNARD, Kenneth
Il est domage que tu es kennard :P
VODICKA, James
BEGAY, Flebix
More to follow. Hopefully soon.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Paging Nimrod Glascock
Lordy Lordy Lordy let's get right to these crazy names.
JOLLY, Gerry R.
LOUITIT, Sinclair T.
Really, it's all about the tit. And Sinclair is laughable.
SUKUP, John P.
TUBBS, Glen E.
What a pairing.
KING, Firmer J.
This makes me think of large, hard mattresses.
HEAPY, Thomas M.
ARCE, Peter A.
Is it pronounced arse? That would make both names for stuff below the belt.
ACTION, Johnny D.
Names seriously don't get better than this.
CHUBB, Percy
CHANCE, Lewlie G.
LAVENDER, Holly White
This is a man's name. And his colors.
GOBBLE, Weldon R. Jr.
HISCOCK, William
No, not mycock! Hiscock!
SNEEN, Marvin L. Jr.
LOOKER, Frank
MISSEY, Melvin M.
JESTER, Mayo
COCKMAN, Oren K.
Na na na na na na na na Cockman!!
BUNN, Gay C.
Did the Navy have an qualms admitting this guy?
LITTLEJOHN, Jack
Just amuses me.
FANNY, Roy L.
Is this the American or British fanny?
SASS, Elmer W.
SAMPLE, Samuel M.
SCHWING, John C.
Wayne's World!
LEMOS, Faust
KUNTA, Rudolph F.
Really? Really.
SMART, Webber
And now the name that prompted me post my latest list:
GLASCOCK, Nimrod
I might have to scan his name and signature....too many people did not believe this one.
JOLLY, Gerry R.
LOUITIT, Sinclair T.
Really, it's all about the tit. And Sinclair is laughable.
SUKUP, John P.
TUBBS, Glen E.
What a pairing.
KING, Firmer J.
This makes me think of large, hard mattresses.
HEAPY, Thomas M.
ARCE, Peter A.
Is it pronounced arse? That would make both names for stuff below the belt.
ACTION, Johnny D.
Names seriously don't get better than this.
CHUBB, Percy
CHANCE, Lewlie G.
LAVENDER, Holly White
This is a man's name. And his colors.
GOBBLE, Weldon R. Jr.
HISCOCK, William
No, not mycock! Hiscock!
SNEEN, Marvin L. Jr.
LOOKER, Frank
MISSEY, Melvin M.
JESTER, Mayo
COCKMAN, Oren K.
Na na na na na na na na Cockman!!
BUNN, Gay C.
Did the Navy have an qualms admitting this guy?
LITTLEJOHN, Jack
Just amuses me.
FANNY, Roy L.
Is this the American or British fanny?
SASS, Elmer W.
SAMPLE, Samuel M.
SCHWING, John C.
Wayne's World!
LEMOS, Faust
KUNTA, Rudolph F.
Really? Really.
SMART, Webber
And now the name that prompted me post my latest list:
GLASCOCK, Nimrod
I might have to scan his name and signature....too many people did not believe this one.
Monday, July 6, 2009
The agony
DANGLER, Denis D
I appreciated the alliteration as well as the dangler.
ROY, Irby
He was so irbed, I mean irked by his name.
COWARD, Charles
He played the lion.
CRAZYTHUNDER, David F
Not just thunder...
WHITEBREAD, Elwood
So plain, yet Elwood adds a nice touch.
WALKER, Alonza Jr
I just can't fathom passing that name on.
JUNK, Ruediger H
Really?
BAD COB, Sylvester
What a corny name! What a corny comment!
SNOW, Time T
It's time! Time for what? Cold precipitation!
TUBBY, Jerry
Fat or thin, this name sucks.
CHRONIC, Joseph
Cool.
ANGER, Lawrence
I imagine that's how most Lawrences feel.
BONGABONG, Apoloni A
Whatthewhat?
GOODENOUGH, Robert
Yep. That's all I got.
TEET, Thomas
Why?
BUDAY, R E
I know it's not spelled properly, but how can you not think of cleaning butts?
DICK, Odie B
A combination of two winners.
WINKLESAS, Layne A
It's always wonderful to find a silly surname paired with a gem first name.
P.S. I don't find all of these. My coworkers helpfully discover funny things and allow me to list them here. Hooray for nice people!
I appreciated the alliteration as well as the dangler.
ROY, Irby
He was so irbed, I mean irked by his name.
COWARD, Charles
He played the lion.
CRAZYTHUNDER, David F
Not just thunder...
WHITEBREAD, Elwood
So plain, yet Elwood adds a nice touch.
WALKER, Alonza Jr
I just can't fathom passing that name on.
JUNK, Ruediger H
Really?
BAD COB, Sylvester
What a corny name! What a corny comment!
SNOW, Time T
It's time! Time for what? Cold precipitation!
TUBBY, Jerry
Fat or thin, this name sucks.
CHRONIC, Joseph
Cool.
ANGER, Lawrence
I imagine that's how most Lawrences feel.
BONGABONG, Apoloni A
Whatthewhat?
GOODENOUGH, Robert
Yep. That's all I got.
TEET, Thomas
Why?
BUDAY, R E
I know it's not spelled properly, but how can you not think of cleaning butts?
DICK, Odie B
A combination of two winners.
WINKLESAS, Layne A
It's always wonderful to find a silly surname paired with a gem first name.
P.S. I don't find all of these. My coworkers helpfully discover funny things and allow me to list them here. Hooray for nice people!
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